*Updated 3/18/21

The following includes recent pieces of national, Illinois and Chicago news as well as our professional interpretations and recommendations. This is not legal or healthcare advice.

As we head into the new year, it’s natural to reflect on what we want for ourselves in the future. For many newly or still engaged couples, that means planning a dream wedding. At the same time, it’s important to remember to be grateful for what we have, too.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your priorities is that they’re going to continue to evolve as your life, accomplishments and the world around you change. Your goals should feel right for right now.

Jot down what you have and want for 2021. Here are some examples that might be relevant to you.

Have

Health
Loving support
Fiancé/e

Want

Protect health of self & loved ones
Supportive vendors & a plan
Get married surrounded by friends & family

Once you can articulate or visualize what you have and what you want, it’s easier to wrap your head around your priorities. This is a great exercise for you and your partner to do anytime, even long before getting engaged or planning your wedding and certainly long after.

“While it can be helpful to think about 2021 as a reset, that mindset is only relevant to what you have control over. The reset needs to be a mental one.” - Heather Z. Lyons, a therapist in Baltimore and co-founder of withtherapy.com, Huffpost.

So what does planning a wedding look like in 2021?

If 2020 taught us anything, it’s that we should look for balance. So here’s some cautiously optimistic news for 2021 weddings.

As of March 18, 2021, the current status of weddings in Chicago, IL, is cautiously reopening. Chicago and Cook County are solidly in Phase 4. Current Phase 4 guidelines effective today include:

Phase 4:

Gatherings

Limit indoor social events to lesser of 50 guests OR maximum occupancy of 50% of facility capacity or the lessor of 100 guests or 50% capacity of the outdoor space; staff not included in this limit
Venue operators should design a plan to allow for social distancing within the workplace and if needed, designate employee(s) to monitor capacity limits and social distancing
Venue operators should limit the occupancy of common areas/ break rooms to allow for social distancing of 6-ft. or greater by removing/decommissioning furniture or staggering break times; this guideline is not intended to diminish employees break time requirements

Additionally, it is anticipated that once we’re in the Bridge to Phase 5, this updated guidance will establish new capacity limits for settings determined by risk level. In an update to current Phase 4 mitigations, individuals with proof of full vaccination — defined as 14 days after receiving a final vaccine dose — or a negative COVID-19 test (PCR) 1-3 days prior to an event do not count against capacity limits. (This may require adding proof of full vaccination or negative test to your digital RSVPs)

Restaurants, Bars and Events

Can operate indoors at lesser of 50% or 50 people per space
Larger establishments that can fit more than 50 people within a room at 50% capacity can use impermeable barriers such as plexiglass in order to divide rooms into multiple spaces. Provided that these spaces are fully divided by impermeable barriers, and that tables are six feet apart with no more than six people per table, establishments may have the lesser of 50% capacity or 50 people within each space.
Food must be available at all times in order to offer indoor service
Bars, taverns or breweries without a food license can reopen indoors as long as they ensure that food is always available. This can be done by making menus available and allowing delivery or allowing patrons to order from third-party delivery services.
Table size limited to no more than six people indoors and outdoors with tables spaced six feet apart.
Bar seating allowed with six feet between parties
Patrons must be seated at all times while eating or drinking
Face coverings must be worn at all times, except when seated and actively eating or drinking
Outdoor service includes:
Rooms with retractable roofs
Rooftops
Multi-party structures, such as tents, with at least 50% of walls open
Single-party structures, such as igloos, with proper ventilation
Tables within eight feet of a wall that is at least 50% open
Indoor events allowed at 50% capacity with no more than 50 individuals. Events must follow indoor dining guidelines
Establishments must close for on-site service at 1:00 a.m. They may serve alcohol until that time provided that patrons are fully off-site by 1:00 a.m.

Places of Worship

50% capacity, with no more than 50 people in any one space
Face coverings must be worn at all times
Special events capped at no more than 50% capacity or 50 people, while following indoor dining regulations

Current resources for Phase 4 & Bridge to Phase 5 are here:

Our professional interpretation from the current state includes the following safe ways to celebrate:

Marry at a venue, outside or at home with up to 50 guests or 50% of indoor capacity or up to 100 or 50% of outdoor capacity (the lessor of each).
Marry virtually, as provided legally by Executive Order 2020-36

In each case, you have to decide if your priority is to marry now and safely or to wait and plan for a future celebration. When you search for vendors, be open and ask them what they’re comfortable with. For instance, we were willing to perform our officiating services outdoors during Phase 4 Tier 3 Mitigations, but hesitated to enter a personal home to perform services. In these instances, we can provide ordination coaching to a friend or family member who can become ordained to perform your ceremony. We can even write the script for them. In virtual ceremonies, everyone can stay home and safe, and you can still have your large guestlist included if you choose to share your virtual ceremony or marriage license signing with them.

It’s important to take those guests that you so badly want to have with you, into consideration when realistically planning your wedding. While we’re following the law, just because something is legal doesn’t mean you have to or should move forward. Local restrictions may not prevent your large gathering, but also consider how comfortable your guests might be, attending such an event. If you were to go through with a large wedding, would all of your guests attend? Would they feel comfortable revising their RSVP or would they just not show and still end up costing you food, décor and the space of a larger venue?

What about the vaccines, won’t that fix everything?

“I think people’s perception is you get the vaccine and you’re safe and finally we can stop all this masking and social distancing and stuff, but that’s not actually reality.” - Debra Goff, infectious disease pharmacist at the Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center, Insider

The likely reality is that the vaccines may disappoint some expectations. A brief look back to the Polio vaccine shows us that while Polio was identified in 1840 with possible cases as far back as 1835, it wasn’t until 1916 that the US Public Health Service documented the spread of infection by asymptomatic persons. In 1949 scientists were, for the first time, able to begin piecing together a vaccine. The vaccine as we know it wasn’t actually produced for testing until 1954 and required boosters prescribed anywhere from several weeks to several years apart. Throughout this time, certain public gatherings and summer activities were canceled to protect citizens from the disease as deemed necessary and certain strains of Polio were finally eradicated worldwide in 1999.

We can also look at the Spanish Flu and how it infected an estimated third of the world population between 1918 and 1920. Keep in mind, the Spanish Flu is still very much a part of our seasonal flu cycle, with annual vaccinations against forecasted strains.

We’re not qualified scientists and we appreciate that Polio and the Spanish Flu aren’t COVID-19. There isn’t a one-to-one comparison between the differences in medical knowledge, technology, funding and politics. Instead, for the sake of argument, let’s assume that these historical examples have a 10% correlation to COVID-19 and the current vaccines in production. That could mean that while Polio took 164 years to be eradicated, it could take sixteen and half years to eliminate or temper COVID-19 to a seasonal flu-like status with vaccines.

The good news is, global COVID-19 vaccines were developed, produced and approved much faster than ever before, even more than optimistically expected. The new hurdle seems to be distribution.

“The effort to distribute and administer the vaccine is not progressing as it should, it’s going to take years, not months, to vaccinate the American people.”
- President-elect Joe Biden, Reuters
“We know from the vaccine clinical trials that it’s going to take about ten to fourteen days for you to start to develop protection from the vaccine. That first dose we think gives you somewhere around 50% and you need that second dose to get up to 95%.” - Christian Ramers, infectious disease specialist with Family Health Centers of San Diego, Reuters, in response to reports of a nurse testing positive for COVID-19 eight days after receiving the Pfizer vaccination).

Even optimistic timelines that point to May as when the American public may have access to vaccines warn that boosters could take an additional month or more. Dr. Fauci has warned that “going back to normal” won’t happen until the virus is eliminated by vaccinating a certain percent of the population.

“We need to have some humility here. We really don’t know what the real [herd immunity] number is. I think the real range is somewhere between 70 to 90 percent. But, I’m not going to say 90 percent.” - Dr. Anthony Fauci, Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, Reuters

Our medical and political leaders are expressing their concern and cautious optimism but the world of weddings isn’t getting much direction on what to expect. Unfortunately this has a nasty trickle down effect. Scientists and doctors can’t say for sure what we should expect, the government at all levels is floundering, trying to make sense of the situation and act on their interpretations and resources available. Wedding planners and industry professionals are closed for the winter season or for good, operating cautiously, or operating openly despite restrictions.

An example of Chicago venues who are closing at least temporarily include: Lincoln Park (March 2021), Brookfield Zoo (March 2021) and The Art Institute of Chicago (Jan 2022).

Adding another layer of complexity, is the global vaccination effort. Not all countries have the vaccine yet or are even communicating accurate information about the virus. With more and more couples traveling and staying in close contact with friends and family abroad, the portion of guest lists that include international travel has grown over the past decade. Some guests may be locked down due to COVID-19 while others may be free to travel but not have access to the vaccine and risk bringing the virus with them. Each destination may then have a voluntary or required quarantine period for travelers coming from different states and countries which may impact their plans.

“Effective January 26, the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) will require all air passengers entering the United States (including U.S. citizens and Legal Permanent Residents) to present a negative COVID-19 test, taken within three calendar days of departure or proof of recovery from the virus within the last 90 days. Airlines must confirm the negative test result or proof of recovery for all passengers two years of age and over prior to boarding. Airlines must deny boarding of passengers who do not provide documentation of a negative test or recovery.” - travel.state.gov

It also remains to be seen whether the recent news of the COVID-19 strain mutation will change the course of vaccines or their effectiveness. So far, scientists have determined that the mutated strain is much more contagious with an increased R factor.

So where does this leave you, the engaged couple?

Lost, frustrated, and likely stressed beyond belief. With no clear answers on what to expect, you’re experiencing a loss of control. We all are. Trust me, as a planner, I eat, sleep and breathe planning. Getting up in the morning and facing a time when that’s the one thing no one can really confidently do, is heartbreaking and it takes a toll.

Recall the priorities exercise at the beginning of this post.

If your priorities are to have a wedding where you can hug your guests, dance the Hora, or know that you are not risking the health of yourself or any guests, these are our recommendations for you:

Postpone your large celebration to or beyond fall 2021 and or
Marry in a private or virtual ceremony
- With or without canceling large celebration plans

“I don’t think you’ll be able to have a spring wedding. It just doesn’t seem feasible. And it would be a very big travesty for any person who gets the virus now and dies from it because it is something that can be prevented. Unfortunately I see it every day, just people dying from this.” - Dr. Edgar Herrera Sanchez, infectious disease expert and vice chairman of Orlando Health’s Infectious Disease Group, Insider
“If we deploy a vaccine and we implement public-health measures, I think it might even be sooner than that. But 2022, I think, is a pretty good bet. A combination of an effective vaccine and adherence to certain public health principles will get us to the point where we want to be, by the end of 2021. I never said just the vaccine. You never should abandon the public-health measures.” - Dr. Anthony Fauci, Insider

At the end of the day, it’s our opinion that a prolonged illness or death related directly or indirectly to a celebration is unacceptable. We’re actively declining business where we perceive it may jeopardize our values or safety and that of our clients. We are not currently booking weddings and events without the clear expectation that Chicago COVID-19 restrictions will be followed, regardless of the actual venue location (whichever is safer or more strict). Weddings and events with guest lists larger than 50 are being considered with agreement to acknowledge the risks and plan based on a tiered guest count. We’ve created the following table to share our current approach. A Bridge to Phase 5

How to use this table (as of January 1, 2021)

Timeline

February weddings - refer to the first row
Mar-May weddings - refer to the second row
June-Aug weddings - refer to the third row
Sept -Nov weddings - refer to the fourth row
Dec-Feb 2022 weddings - refer to the fifth row

Contingencies
These are recommendations or restrictions that you should plan for or consider.

Can you take advantage of outdoor space or indoor space where at least 50% of the walls open to the outside?
Do you need to cut your guest list?
Do you need to check in with your vendors to confirm what services they can safely provide and that you can safely host?
Would offering virtual components such as streaming and recording make your celebration more safe?

Vendors Affected
Any change in scope (guest count, location, date/time, etc) can potentially affect all your contracted vendors. These are the first and priority vendors likely to be affected by a severe decrease in guest count, assuming you keep your date. If you choose to postpone or cancel, we advise you to review your contracts and communicate with all your vendors.

Guests

A10 = 25 guests on your A list, to whom you send a save the date communication.
B15 = 25 guests on your B list, keep them in the loop via your website but avoid investing in formal communications until you are closer to your date. Consider sending a streaming or recording link invitation.
C25 = 50 guests on your C list, consider keeping them in the loop via your website but avoid investing in formal communications until you are closer to your date. Consider sending a streaming or recording link invitation.

Your guest list counts might look different from this based on two variables:

If your wedding is outdoors, we can lean on the face that historically, when indoor capacity was at 50 guests, outdoor capacity was at 100 guests. This isn’t guaranteed, however, we’re hopeful this would be the case by summer.
You may choose to make your A list match your breaking point. If you decide you would walk away if you can’t have 40 people at your wedding, then your A list might be 40. This simplifies your tentative counts offered to your vendors, just be sure to keep them in the loop about where you stand now and if you make a call to postpone or cancel.

We recommend you identify and document your breaking point on guest count. For some that may be 100, for others that’s 60 or 10. There’s no right or wrong answer, you have to make this decision and then plan for the relevant contingencies.

What if you decide to postpone or cancel?

In the grand scheme of things, some couples are choosing to prioritize their health, buying a home, or simply postponing to absolve themselves from the stress of trying to plan a celebration during a time when celebrations are unsafe, limited or banned. We see you, and we hear you. Our advice for those of you looking to postpone or cancel your large celebration is to check your contracts and start open conversations with your vendors.

Some vendors may have the financial means to accommodate your decision and others may not. Always check your contracts and have the highlights in front of you for your conversations. Ask for clarification on their clauses about changes in scope or location, postponement, cancellation and Force Majeure.

It’s important to enter these conversations with grace and empathy. If you have to postpone or cancel, you’re hurting and frustrated, and so are your vendors. If a contract is clear on terms and you ask for wiggle room, understand when your vendors sympathize but cannot hand back refunds, especially for work done and dates held. You may have lost some of your investment already, and it’s possible that if you continue to make investments and end up postponing again or cancelling, you may lose more.

To assist couples facing postponement, we’ve created a helpful guide to walk you through the process including inquiry, tracking and email templates. You can download both our Wedding Postponement Guide and the Wedding Planning Timeline Table here.